You never actually own a Jonny Concrete door stop, you merely look after it for the next generation. They aren't just a device for holding doors open, they're an heirloom that transfers values across generations.

They are also heavy and should not be used in place of a buoyancy aid, dropped on feet or thrown at windows or people.

If you love your Jonny Concrete doorstop, we recommend regularly letting it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be.

Please note however that it's extremely, extremely unlikely it will leave at all, that's why they are so good for holding doors open. In the unlikely event it does we recommend asking family members, friends and other tealeafs you know before assuming it wasn't meant to be. And definitely buy a second one because they are all very different.

Above all, remember - 'Its better to have owned a Jonny Concrete doorstop and lost it than to have never owned one at all.' Alfred Lord Tennyson's brother by another mother

If you follow our stories on Instagram (@jonnyconcreteuk) you may be able to find one of the square doorstops we leave around London for people to find. These are completely free for you to keep, no strings attached. We do ziptie a small wooden plaque to them with a bit of blurb on it, but that's the only thing attached to it.

For those of you who can't be arthed to go looking or if you need a fine lump of concrete urgently you can buy our round doorstops for £45 each which includes delivery to UK addresses.

This is amazing value at under 0.0013p per day based on a 100+ year life expectancy.

You can also have your round doorstop personalised as a gift for a birthday, wedding, house warming, funeral or other celebration. This can make for a very original concrete doorstop present and will often make the gifter the favourite child, relative, friend or guest. It can also make gifting a lump of old concrete a much more thoughtful and sensitive thing to do than might otherwise be the case.

Finally, because our doorstops are highly collectable and a shrewd investment that will only go up in value (much like a crypto, but with upward only wild price swings) we date them so you can show your friend copied you, not the other way around.

Message us on IG, email us or call us to discuss your requirements with one of our thoughtfulness experts.

For the sake of clarity, as King Alfred famously said 'THOU MAYEST NOTTEST PURCHASE THE SQUARE DOORSTOPS', you have to find these. You can only buy the round doorstops.